The Ukrainian-Russian conflict rages on, and America has been dutifully maintaining its neutrality. Putin, in spite of his warning to the Western powerhouse that interference will entail vicious reprisals, is mildly miffed that his bluff hasn't been called. He had noticed, however, that Americans have been tumultuous over the soaring petrol prices across the nation, and he knew he had to capitalise on that. He did so by informing the world that American petrol prices will soon become $25pg if the skirmish carries on.
Putin knows that petrol prices are far beyond his power, but he is aware that Republicans are under the impression that Biden is spiking the prices, even though America follows a free market and this is really a result of the petrol companies wanting to make more money. He surmises that this'll be the push America needs to finally dip its toes into the battle.
Russian propagandist Aleksei Bambetov commented "I'm gonna have a field day with this. Everyone knows there's no greater simpleton than a Republican".
In other news, electric vehicles have become all the rave amidst the grievances of petrol affordability. We here at The Forced News refuse any attempt at paid promotions, however (seriously though, go buy an EV. They're really cool).
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